Out with the negatives in with the positives!

Its really crazy how life works. How one person that meant so much to you could bring so much negative in your life.

I would like to think that he didn't mean to and when he promised me forever he meant it. He was truly my happy. One thing I don't regret is my baby boy that we created out of love and passion.

Yesterday someone hit my car when I was in a parking lot, the impact sent my baby into some serious distress, which made us spend hours at the children's hospital. What drives me crazy was my ex was so eager to blame me that he didn't once ask if our baby was okay.

After last night and the last 5 months, well really since he went back to the States in December I see how he really is towards my son which isn't much. I feel like he has replaced him with this new baby that is only 5 months younger than our baby. (sad hey?!) Sure I get this happens to a lot of people but it doesn't happen to me!

I would be okay with the situation if his girlfriend wasn't so mean and didn't slander my name because of lies that he told or if she didn't talk bad about my baby. But what drives me crazy more is how she lies and to him. There is a stupid anonymous blog that anyone can write on and not leave your name, well she writes personal things he or his family has said all to make his ex wife and I look bad and she does it on horrible days like the day of his brothers funeral or when he is playing football, well all the time. It easy to trace her IP address to her especially when it comes from a hospital in Cali where she is. One would like to think that living with him and having his baby would make you secure enough not to write on there, I can happily say I barely even look on there anymore cause all it is, is a bunch of insecure girls all sleeping with the same guy trying to hurt each other... UHM NO THANKS!!!

But after last night and knowing how serious things are with my baby and the fact he didn't ask about him nor come to the hospital has really changed my view of him and the situation. I need him out of our lives and I need to cut off all contact with him. I need to protect my son from his life.

All I know is before him, I had the whole world in my hands and nothing could stop me nor break me. I was the happiest girl ever. Well here we go back to that life. Don't get me wrong it isn't going to be easy but damn I deserve it. I have 3 beautiful children and a house full of love and laughter what else could a Mom want.

These girls can stalk me cause that's what his girlfriend does, I am sure within the hour I post this blog he will know. But see I am back in my bubble and not him, his girlfriend or any girl he is sleeping with ( and yes they are other, you can't tell me I am the only one he's been sleeping with since July) can pop my bubble. I am taking back my life! I refuse to be insecure and look girls up when I could be blogging or playing with my kids, I could be doing anything that doesn't waste my energy on the negative.

Besides I don't want a life of lies or a man that constantly cheat on me, but more importantly I could never be with someone that refuses to put his son first or let his girl talk about about his own child.

So out with the negatives and him and HELLO positives.